Visceraman1 - Joshua Lopez

This is what i will be listening to. Probably the only music i will hear for the next few months in fact.

You'll get to hear me muddle through things on your weekends, and you could call in sick...

Someday I will get the plug-ins and listen .. I am looking forward to it.

Hi

You know, if Tom wouldn't throw my resume(s) away, I'd get those plug-ins on your computer with amazing speed. So fast you'd think, "Whoa, bet this fucker's an ace with a lathe or a planer...".

Then you'd find out why my woodshop teacher was delighted on the days I'd cut his class.

Just because I'm not handy doesn't mean my parents should introduce me as "their daughter".

Stupid Macintosh.

You kids are so computer savy.

(Kerry makes a mental note to *not* let Joshua anywhere near his tools.

Ever.

)

Damn you, for putting that addictive McDonald's game up!!

I can't play it with the sound up, the squawking of the employees trying to get my attention unnerves me.

chech this out. http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00005MF9U/ref=br_lf_outlet_25/103-2691443-0365421?n=548166&s=outlet&v=glance

Employee squawking?? Aside from the green cows, that's the best part.

So...You still want some porn?

Check out pinkvisual.com for an idea of what we have.

Lemme know what you want, and I wiil try to make it happen. We now have thousands of un-sellable discs.

This is going to kill my weekend. I will start putting together a list. What makes them un-sellable?

Will - does that mean you and stephanie are in the market?

What music - I don't hear any music? This is kind of like when you were a kid and supposed to be practicing - lots of smoke and mirrors, but NO sound!

What makes them un-sellable is minor surface scratching, due to popping "off spindle" in transit.

Check out www.pinkvisualdvds.com for an idea of what we got.

Oh yeah...I bought a pipe last month. Nowhere near as classy as yours. It takes water. But it's a very pretty pipe. And it makes a very soothing sound, to go along with a soothing smoke.

Aaaaahhhh....

I've proven myself to be *too clumsy* for pipes that contain water. I'm not sure how I haven't proven myself to be *too clumsy* with these briars; I've got holes burned in my shirt, and I'm always covered with ash/dottle/resin.

When I was a kid I had this little red water pipe, plastic and shaped like a bird; you filled it with water, and then when you inhaled, it bubbled and *chirped*.

I'll be looking at the site a bit more - I probably *shouldn't* do it from this computer, otherwise I'll never leave the office and there's *things* to do.

For sound, one would have to launch the audio player on the right. No it's not me, there isn't a recording of me playing. My wife gets to hear me play all the time. My teacher has to listen to me every week - just about. Kerry will have to endure it when I'm swabbing floors in his venue - though the dvd's I'm getting from The Brunson should keep him otherwise engaged.

Well, you'll be getting an assortment, unless you tell me what you want. And yes, I'll be tossing in some cleverly disguised gayporn.

Hey, speaking of gayporn...Here's some cut-n-paste action....

-----So, as most of you know, I work for a porn company.

From time to time, customers return "product" to us. Usually, it's overstock. Occasionally, it's defective material(scratched, bad replication, crushed in transit). Today, I processed 3 returns.

The first was an overstock return. All the discs were in original wrap, no "rattlers".

The second was the same. Everything cool, they just had too much.

The third was NOT the same. All discs had been opened, and inspected/played. I verified scratching/glitches on the first 12. Just as the customer said. The 13th(maybe that IS an unlucky number) was tagged as a disc they said would not play. I opened it up, and pulled the disc out to check for scratching(A lot of DVDs pop off their case-spindle in transit, and get scratched to hell). Upon turning the disc over, I saw it was encrusted with something that looked like dried pork gravy, or perhaps donut glaze. Then I noticed it was also on the case. I immediately thought...Jizz. I vomited in my mouth, swallowed it back, and tried to dismiss it as something else. No dice. I'm pretty sure it was semen. I popped it back on its spindle, and went to wash my hands. 3 times. With bleach. Hosed my desk/table down. With bleach. Wanted to take a "Silkwood" shower at that point. With bleach. Smoked a cigarette(OK, 4 of 'em), and returned to the matter at hand (no pun intended). Sent an email to everyone within the department, telling them what I'd found, and indirectly asking the sales rep who authorized said return "What the fuck??!!".

Discs 14-17 were truly defective.-----

So, I was wondering...I don't suppose you (with your fancy-lad job at UMC), might know how I can find out if it was semen or not. Any ideas? I asked CPL Brunson if the local constabulary could do it, but no dice.

So I'm asking you: How can I find out if it's spunk or not? I don't really care WHOSE spunk it might be, just looking to find out if it's some sort of human genetic material.

And my pipe is beautiful. It's not shaped like a bird, but still lovely. I love this pipe. Too bad I'm having such a hard time finding something to feed it.

Im sure your mother is enjoying all this porn as much your wife.

It looks like my mom just checked in for the year, so she probably doesn't know about any porn. My wife might like something from the big cock series: "see Joshua, that's how it's supposed to look.."

I like to fill my pipe with a few different blends, I don't think it's unreasonable that Cpl. Brunson offer a few samples either. Surely there's got to be something lying around the constabulary....

I shall fill a box tomorrow, as soon as I get back from the movie/lunch that the video department is taking me on. 25 discs (assorted, of course...no one needs 25 copies of the same disc) sound OK?? You might end up with some stuff you aren't into, but hey...it's free.

No idea where to take this crusty disc?? Tsk-tsk, my fellow "Ficketteer". I guess I could just pay someone $20 to lick it (the company doesn't really care what it is. But I do), and tell me what it tastes like...Hmmmm...

Movie and lunch? I hope it's not an uplifiting, pro-teamwork sort of film...take plenty of notes, bring your red notebook, and for fuckssakes, stay on the right side of the yellow line.

No, it was a "Pirates of the Carribean 2". Eh, it was OK, but the best part was getting out of our "Easy-Bake oven"/warehouse for a few hours. You could see your breath in the theater, that's how nice it was.

Oh, the yellow line. Man, that shit was stupid.

In '93, I was working in construction, and we did the fire sprinklers there. The line was STILL THERE!! Faded, but still there. So was John Michaels. Even though it was summertime, he would still come by every day. He would get sooo pissed off seeing us smoke inside the school. Friday afternoons were great. All the crews would hang out, and drink beer after work. He wanted to cry.

Then we landed the Palo Verde contract. Not as much fun, 'cause no one came by to check up on us. That summer was the first time I set foot in the gym locker rooms. Thank god that school offerred bowling as PE.

I've still never seen the locker rooms either; I did my PE nonsense through Project M.O.R.E., which meant, playing Nintendo counted as hand eye coordination activity, and vacuuming counted as well - since it tuckered the counselor out. Anytime I happen to pass Tucson Bowl, I tell Jeri, "That's where Seth had his P.E." She's a Cholla girl, who finds the notion a bit unbelievable.

When you were at Fickett, did you see Mario?

No Gastellums were sighted, that I can recall.

Although he may have been roaming the grounds, reliving bygone days of "Turkey Trots", post-lunch antics, and mile runs.

But I wouldn't know. We were stuck inside.