Main

April 02, 2007

Dear Diary: Tramp

So Saturday was a bit of a waste of time. One of those, "We'll deliver your sofa between 11 and 3" kind of days. Despite my frantic nose pressing against the front door, I was perhaps the more patient of the two of us. Something neither of us had taken into consideration when procuring the sette, was the size of the fucker. Now, those who've been to our bungalow know what we're talking about. Maybe not though. It's not the size of the room marking the final destination of the sofa, but rather the size of the passage way leading from atrium into the salon that suddenly became a problem.

Not for me mind you, I just stood there flapping my gums, pretending I was a handyman - hoping to thwart any "hey buddy can you hand me that stick thing?". And for good measure, I stretched out a hand to try and help get this sofa through the passage way.

One of the delivery kids (well, 1 kid, 1 felon...clearly), was pretty lazy and unimaginative about the whole thing. Let's just call him Felon. (Or Anybody. Or Somebody. Or Nobody). He was all too eager to call it a day, leave us trapped in our home by a sofa, and leave for his 40oz. Fuck him, I've called the probation office about him...but that's another story, for much later like say...next month's entry. Moving on:

The kid was having no part of that, the sofa was going in the house if it was the last thing he did before dying. Well, that, and try to get that piece of Jeri's hair to stay down once and for all.

And because of him, and his patience, we now have a new sofa. I apologize again for your broken finger, and hope your cohort didn't short you on the tip.

Contrived by Joshua at April 2, 2007 09:35 AM

Comments

How great does the couch look?...I'm sure a broken finger and a little touch up paint was well worth the comfort of the butts most favorite place to sit...

Posted by: Tragic at April 2, 2007 08:13 PM

Its pretty slick!

Posted by: doodle at April 3, 2007 03:55 AM

I think it looks quite nice; and from my appointed perch on a drop cloth in the middle of the room, it looks like it's pretty comfortable too.

Posted by: Joshua at April 3, 2007 08:24 AM

But, but, but ... Joshua, how does it make you feel?

Posted by: Kerry at April 3, 2007 09:52 AM

Well, I feel like my body is always vibrating, leading up to the tremble - and the point at which I start spilling things, hence the floor/dropcloth.

Posted by: Joshua at April 3, 2007 12:37 PM

Embellishments I assure you. But I have asked that he stops sitting down with scissors in his back pocket!

Posted by: doodle at April 3, 2007 06:59 PM

Look, I may be (sorry) a bit on the crazy side, but I still know the difference between the sofa, and the dropcloth. True...spilling may be a bit overboard....tis you that spills Ms. Sippycup!

Posted by: Joshua at April 4, 2007 10:13 AM

You get to sit directly on the dropcloth? I am talking to Teg about this, I have to put newspaper on top of the drop cloth. Scissors, you get scissors?

Congrats!o

Posted by: Kerry at April 4, 2007 01:54 PM

Ole Nate is at the Plasma center, for those readers who are interested.

Posted by: doodle at April 5, 2007 07:21 PM

Ok, I wouldn't call them "scissors" necessarily, since they're made entirely out of plastic. (As mandated by certain people).

Red Cross/Plasma Center/...you're just trying to incite trouble aren't you!

Posted by: Joshua at April 6, 2007 08:27 AM

Remember whose site this is.

Posted by: doodle at April 7, 2007 03:17 AM

I have heard of this plasma center. I think I will quit working, and sell my plasma. You know at $30 a visit I can more than support my wife and I. Thats why I love visceraman1. I can learn about tobacco, and find new ways to get rich quick. Life is indeed grand.

Posted by: will at April 7, 2007 07:20 AM

My girl is back in town.

Posted by: doodle at April 9, 2007 06:46 PM

It is soooo nice to be back home...It was yucky on the mountain weather wise....Plasma for Nate?..hmmm..for some reason it seems to suit him.. he has visited the place enough they might as well put him to work...

Posted by: Tragic at April 10, 2007 12:44 AM

If you dont respond, I assume you are still sitting on the curb.

Posted by: doodle at April 10, 2007 06:59 PM

Timing is everything..or perhaps the lack of....

Posted by: Tragic at April 11, 2007 07:04 PM

Dammit Jeri Blank.

Posted by: will at April 11, 2007 08:20 PM

Yeah Jeri!

Posted by: Joshua at April 12, 2007 04:58 PM

Post a comment




Remember Me?

(you may use HTML tags for style)